🎤 The SoundSnobs Karaoke Commandments (Read This. Seriously.)
Thou shalt respect the mic.
This is the golden rule. Don’t bang it. Don’t hit it. Don’t wander off with it. Don’t grab it from another singer. The mic is not a prop, a weapon, or communal property. Respect the mic.
Thou shalt tip thy bartenders & wait staff.
They are the real MVPs of the night. They keep you hydrated, buzzed, and feeling brave enough to sing. Take care of them. Karaoke hits harder when the bar staff is happy.
Thou shalt not pick a song longer than 6 minutes.
We love you, but this is karaoke — not a prog-rock concept album. Long songs on busy nights slow the whole room down. Be kind. Pick shorter bangers.
Thou shalt not be rude to other singers.
No booing. No heckling. No “I was drunk” excuses. If someone gets on stage, they’re already doing something brave. If you can’t be supportive, be quiet.
Thou shalt not sing or rap racial slurs.
Explicit lyrics? Fine. Slurs? Absolutely not. Skip the word and keep it moving.
Thou shalt not ask the KJ to bump thee up in the rotation.
We don’t bump singers. We don’t accept bribes. Everyone waits their turn like adults.
Thou shalt not drink and drive.
We want you alive, well, and back at karaoke next week. Call a Lyft. Call an Uber. Call a friend. Call your ex. Walk home. Figure it out — just don’t drive.
Thou shalt read the room.
Yes, we probably have that song. Should you sing it right now? That’s the real question. Pick something that matches the vibe so you can feed off the crowd instead of confusing it.
Thou shalt not sign up someone else to sing.
Encouragement is cute. Forcing someone to sing is not. For some people, karaoke is a literal nightmare — and we’d rather they come back than be traumatized forever.
Thou shalt have fun (like, actually).
Clap. Cheer. Support everyone — not just your friends. You never know who’s about to walk up there and absolutely destroy that stage.